Coolest Movie PosterFor Your Eyes Only (1981)
This iconic poster frames 007 between a Bond girl’s perfect legs. Added bonus: She’s holding a crossbow!
Best Car Lotus Esprit •
The Spy Who Loved Me (1977)
Yeah, sure, a gadget-laden Aston Martin is the Bond automotive icon, but for fans who came aboard in the Roger Moore era, how do you beat a Lotus that turns into a submarine?
Most Ludicrous Car Invisible Aston Martin •
Die Another Day With its invisibility button, this Bond car officially passed into the realm of utter make-believe. Does the car also shoot lightning bolts and track unicorns?
Worst StuntBond surfs on a tidal wave created by a melted glacier •
Die Another Day (2002)
This scene was so clearly computer-generated it would have looked more at home in an animated kid flick like Ice Age.
Most Meaningless Theme Song “Thunderball”
“And he strikes like Thu-u-u-u-n-derball.” Huh? Even composer John Barry admitted the words were absurd. Respect to singer Tom Jones, however.
Best Opening SequenceCasino Royale (2006)
It might not have had the outrageous stunts of many of its predecessors, but the black-and-white footage of Bond grimly executing his first two kills to obtain his 00 status packed more punch than any quasi-unbelievable action scene.
Hottest Bond Girls of All TimeHonor Blackman as Pussy Galore •
Goldfinger (1964)
Evil mastermind Auric Goldfinger’s plan to contaminate all the gold in Fort Knox could never have gotten off the ground without the help of the sexy pilot with the least subtle name in cinematic history.
Ugliest American Sheriff J.W. Pepper •
Live and Let Die (1973)
This redneck lawman enjoys shooting dogs, spitting tobacco, and arresting black people. For some reason that earned him a return cameo in
The Man With the Golden Gun, in which he runs into Bond, oddly enough, in Bangkok.
Best Quick Change Bond peels off a wetsuit to reveal a crisp tuxedo •
Goldfinger (1964)
Hot damn, not even the bow tie got damp! Guess nobody could tell Bond that he was “all washed up,” eh? Sorry.
Most Unnecessarily Elaborate Assassination Attempt Bond lowered slowly into a shark tank •
Live and Let DieWe’ll spot you the sharks. But, really, wouldn’t you at least consider tossing the dude in quickly?
MOST FAMOUS PEOPLE YOU FORGOT WERE BOND CHARACTERSChristopher Walken as Max Zorin in
A View to a Kill (1985)
Role: Tech entrepreneur who plots to corner the microchip market by flooding San Francisco.
Outcome: Gets into it with Bond on the Golden Gate Bridge. Bad idea.
Hervé Villechaize as Nick Nack in
The Man With the Golden GunRole: Diminutive butler and henchman to the Man With the Golden Gun. Not particularly dangerous, although he does possess a talent for scrambling under furniture and kicking shins.
Outcome: Waits until Bond is about to have sex, then tries to kill him. In return Bond locks him in a suitcase. De shame! De shame!
Wayne Newton as Professor Joe Butcher in
Licence to Kill (1989)
Role: Televangelist who secretly sells cocaine to drug dealers worldwide.
Outcome: Seen fleeing like a girl as his meditation center/drug processing plant blows up.
Benicio Del Toro as Dario in
Licence to KillRole: Creepy drug cartel enforcer who tilts his head to the side whenever he threatens people.
Outcome: Shredded to pieces after being pulled into a drug pulverizer.
Telly Savalas as Blofeld in
On Her Majesty’s Secret Service (1969)
Role: Bond’s nemesis gets his ass whupped by 007 in a bobsled chase.
Outcome: As vengeance, he has Bond’s wife killed.
Teri Hatcher as Paris Carver in
Tomorrow Never Dies (1997)
Role: The future Desperate Housewife played Bond’s ex, who is married to a baddie media baron.
Outcome: Her jealous hubby has Paris killed.
Jane Seymour as Solitaire in
Live and Let DieRole: Tarot-card reader who can see the future if she remains a virgin.
Outcome: After nailing her, Bond saves her from dying in a voodoo ritual.
CRAZIEST STUNT: TIE!The jumps in The Spy Who Loved Me and Live and Let DieTSWLM: Bond skis off a cliff, free-falls, and suavely lands with a Brit-flag parachute.
LALD: Bond’s speedboat jumps levees and traffic.
InspirationTSWLM: The idea was stolen from a whiskey ad.
LALD: The script just said, “The most terrific boat chase scene ever seen.”
ObstaclesTSWLM: Film crew had to wait 10 days in Canadian ice for the right weather.
LALD: Producers got 26 speedboats to use for filming the scene; they wrecked 17 of them.
Final ResultTSWLM: Only one of three cameras captured the full fall. Luckily, that was all they needed.
LALD: The greatest boat chase ever filmed, whose jump set a world record.
